General Goblin Fuel

Locations/Replays:


Hero: Hey! Goblin Fuel General!
Goblin Fuel General: Ooooooooh, hello there!
Goblin Fuel General: Is that a shiny new… UNSIGNED…. sponsorship agreement?
Hero: Wow, it actually worked.
Goblin Fuel General: Just sign on the dotted line kid….
Hero: Shouldn't I read it first?
Hero: What about all the tiny fine print?
Goblin Fuel General: Pffft. It would take you hours to read all of that.
Goblin Fuel General: Just sign.
Hero: This is the only way to get in Charlie's head, right?
Goblin Fuel General: Sure kid. What'eva…. just sign.
Hero: Alright. *SIGNS*
Goblin Fuel General: Mwahahahahahahaa!
Hero: What's so funny?
Goblin Fuel General: You are now owned by Goblin Fuel kid!
Hero: I… I am??
Goblin Fuel General: Yep! You and all of Battleon. Yulgar's gonna have Goblin Fuel on tap!
Hero: What? But I didn't agree to THAT!
Goblin Fuel General: Sure you did! It's all right there in the fine print!
Hero: But why would anyone DO this? Are all of these corporate sponsorships so shady?
Goblin Fuel General: Shady? Now that's just hurtful. Besides…
Goblin Fuel General: That's what you get for signing a contract with a knock-off parody energy drink.
Goblin Fuel General: If you wanted a good deal, you shoulda gone for the real thing.
Hero: No way! Give me back that contract!
Goblin Fuel General: Haha… nope! This is what they call… being taken for a ride.
Hero: Literally.

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